Ever since we started understanding what ‘being independent means, that is all we ever wanted to be. Imagine being on your own, doing what you want, eating whatever you like, waking up whenever you fancy, and just basically enjoying your life to the fullest. It is a dream that seems too good to come true.
So, when we want to do it so much, how about we start working for it? What we want is very clear. But how do we do it? There is some confusion there. If we want to be independent kids we need to know what all we have to do.
Have a focused approach to life
As an individual, we need to be clear about what we want to do with our life. And once you know what it is that you want to do, you have to concentrate on how to do it.
If you have a thousand distractions in your life, you are going to have a thousand different ways to not reach your goal. If you want to take charge of your life, then you have to be focused.
Don’t fall prey to peer pressure.
“Peer pressure is the pressure you put on yourself to fit in!” – Jeff Moore
Everyone is unique. Every individual has a different life story. So, it does not make sense if you do something because everyone is doing it. Don’t be influenced by someone just because you think they are cool and you want to be just like them.
Your ‘peers’ are just as confused and unsure about what is going to happen in the future. Whatever they are doing, it may be because they think it is correct for them, but it does not have to be the same way for you. Everyone is trying to find their way. So, know and do what you think is right for yourself.
Moreover, when we are strong on the inside, nothing can affect us. Everyone is trying to be like someone else. We do not have to take part in that rat race. And one more thing, don’t feel the pressure to be like everyone else and do something that you consider to be wrong. Do not be afraid to stand up for yourself.
Even if you feel like you do not have anyone right now, don’t be fraternized with the wrong people just to ‘belong.’ The more time it takes you to find friends, the more special and right they are going to be for you. People who use you, or do not respect you, or make you do things that you do not like are not friends.
Becoming independent might seem daunting and overwhelming when you think about it. But, don’t worry. You don’t have to do everything at once. You have to prioritize.
List out everything you have to do in the order from highest to lowest time constraint and importance. It will make it a lot easier for you. Or else there is going to be a pile of work as high as a mountain and you won’t know what to do with all of it.
Start holding yourself accountable.
More often than none, the idea of becoming independent occurs to us when we are being lectured for not doing something by our parents. You think to yourself, “ how amazing would it be if no one told me what to do. I would do anything I want.”
Well, becoming independent is exactly that. The no-one-telling-you part is taken care of. But here is a very important point. If it is not your parents who are keeping a track of whether you are doing your work or not, then who is it going to be? It’s going to be you!
You are going to have to become the person who keeps track of whether you have done something or not, and if you haven’t done it then how are you going to rectify the situation.
Remember, when you become independent your parents aren’t going to be there to keep reminding you or take the fall for you. You have to learn accountability.
Don’t be afraid to fail.
“Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm.”- Winston Churchill
You are trying something new here. There is a very slim chance that you are going to get it right in the first go. There are bound to be some hiccups along the way. But, that is perfectly alright.
It is okay if you falter. The thing that will matter the most is how you cope with it and pick yourself up. Becoming independent is probably going to be the toughest thing you ever do. But, once you do it, there is nothing like it. So, hang in there and don’t let these temporary setbacks get in the way of your goal.
Decide for yourself.
No matter what anyone says, make your own decisions. It is your life and you are the one who is going to deal with the consequences in the end. All the decisions, big or small, must be taken solely by you. Never take any decisions under someone’s influence, especially your friends.
In the beginning, you are going to make a lot of mistakes. And your decisions may or may not be right all the time. But that is a part and parcel of being independent. And the sooner you start, the better. ‘Why’ you ask? Because then even if you make a mistake the repercussions won’t be dire. And once you are adults, you will make fewer blunders.
However, we can definitely consult with others before making a choice. You can definitely ask your parents, they will give you the most honest answers.
Take responsibility for your education.
The biggest source of our parents’ worry is that we are not serious about our education. But what if we take responsibility for it? Think about it.
See, education is essential for us to do anything in life. It is our life. So whatever we do, it is going to be for a happy life. So, if it is our life and our future, shouldn’t we work for it? Why should our parents turn their hair grey worrying for something that is primarily our job?
I am not saying you are supposed to start paying for education and everything right away. But, you can study on your own. Study whatever you like and however, you like. But, don’t wait for someone to sit on your back and make you do it.
Get advice from your parents
Our parents have a wealth of information and the purest of intentions for us. Whatever they are thinking for us, it is going to be in our best interests. So whenever you are stuck in a ditch, you can always ask for advice from your parents.
Parents have seen the world, they understand how it works. They can give you a clear idea. They have the solution that you need, all you have to do is ask.